How Can You Be Tactful with Unwanted Advice?

If you are a new dad, you may often receive unsolicited advice on how to bring up your baby. Close friends or family members may typically offer this. Casual acquaintances and even total strangers may add their bit.

While it may be well meaning, a torrent of unwanted advice can be highly annoying. Parents have the first prerogative of making choices and making decisions for their baby. Exasperated parents are not to blame if they see unwanted advice as interference in their freedom to bring up their child the way they want to.

However, it is also important that you respond to such counsel in a way that is not hurtful to the other person. These are different approaches you can adopt when faced with unsolicited advice:

• Listen before you react: Listen to and consider a suggestion offered to you before rejecting it. Chances are you may actually value it.
• Find something to agree upon: Even if the advice in its entirety is not acceptable to you, try to see if there is some part of it that you can agree upon, and acknowledge that.
• Be polite: If you know that your rejecting it will not go down well with the person offering you advice, you could thank the person for the concern and let him know you will consider it. It will keep the peace and you are not bound to put it into practice.
• Argue wisely: If you must counter unsolicited suggestions, do so logically, backing your arguments with facts.
• Be frank: If you think it necessary, do not hesitate to let the person know that you do not agree with his or her opinions.

Useful Article: Parenting Advice

Preparing Kids for the Challenges of the First Days of School

It’s hard to imagine what goes on in a little one’s mind when he goes to the big school, but you can help him overcome some fears by talking to him before hand.

For example, many kids at pre-school and even kindergarten level, are nervous about the bathroom. Reassure your child that he can ask to go any time. Some kids have accidents at school, and he should be aware that this type of thing can happen, and does happen to a lot of kids. If you have given him strict instructions on other people touching him in the bathroom, make sure he is aware of how changes in caregiving my change that policy, for example if a teacher has to wipe him. Some kids will time their bowel movements to avoid school time. Discuss this with your doctor if it becomes and issue.

Buy clothes for your child with easy closures. No child at this point wants to have to ask their teacher to help them button their pants. Just at the moment you are trying to teach them autonomy, don’t burden them suddenly with shoelaces that need to be tied by an adult.

School is an ideal time to teach about making friends. You don’t have to be a car salesman to know the value of walking right up to someone, pointing to something you have in common (your love of sand or the color of your tennis shoes) and introducing yourself. This is not a skill that comes easily, but kids can learn these skills to, especially if you show them how it works, by introducing yourself to other moms and dads.

Lunchtime might also be stressful, if your child has never had to eat on her own. Many kids get stressed at lunchtime because they don’t have the leisure to drag it out like they do at home. Make sure your child has items that are easy to manipulate on her own rather than complicated foods that need to be reheated and might be hard to eat.

Your child may be scared of other small details that don’t worry you at all. He might think the school nurse means lots of shots. Or the school bus looks like a big scary tunnel he might get lost in and never find his way back home. Explore and discuss things like this with your child by asking him about his likes and dislikes about the school.

With a very small amount of putting yourself in their shoes, you can easily take steps to ease into the transition to school.

Basic dining etiquette for little kids to learn

Quick ! You have 25 days to get the kids in shape to make a good presentation at Christmas dinner. Like a lot of stuff in parenting, consistency and patience are by-words and yes, you can teach a toddler few new tricks. Here are the basic etiquette skills little ones should have:

• “Please,” “Thank you” and “You’re welcome” are not optional. Repeat them over, invite your kids to correct you, and you’ll find by Christmas a pleasant and polite Pavlovian response.
• Eating with fingers is for babies, with the obvious exceptions ( pizza, ribs, chicken legs for example ). Little kids can use a fork, though you may have to help load it up from time to time. Resist the temptation to feed them and they will pick up this skill, leaving you free to get them another glass of milk.
• Kids need to ask to be excused to leave the table. Teaching kids not to run around during dinner is not that easy, but you’ll make it harder if you chase them around to get them to eat.
• Salt and pepper go together. Pass them together for a polished impression.
• Even little kids can and should use napkins, keep them on their laps, and learn to use them rather than wiping their hands on their pants.

You can make it easier for the kids by eating dinner in a room without distractions like TV, and make a rule not to allow toys or books while eating the family meal together.
Good luck and Bon appetit!

Tips for Dads trying to cut down on Kids TV watching time

We like TV. After a long day at work, it’s like a frothy dessert at the end of a mediocre meal. It might not have any nutrition value, but it’s sweet and airy and enjoyable with very little effort.  However, when TV becomes the routine and more your reality than your real life, you or your kids might have a problem. 

How to know? Do you talk about TV characters’ lives as if they were your family or close friends? Do you miss important events because you can’t bear to miss the earliest episode of your favorite show rather than time-shifting to when it’s convenient?  Would your kids rather watch TV than go to the park or go swimming? Do your kids spend more than the two-hour daily-recommended maximum time in front of the tube? If so, here are a few tips to help you cut down based on a research study in November of 2006 by the Academy of Pediatrics.

• Keep track of TV watching so you really know how bad the problem is. Most people under-estimate how much they and their children watch. Remember to count the time the TV is on is “just on” in the background.
• Take the TV out of the kids’ bedrooms. Having a TV in the bedroom makes monitoring viewing habits more difficult, as well as actual time spent. Additionally, it promotes dual watching/studying.
• Ditto the dining room. Watching TV while eating ensure less communication within the family at a key time for family bonding.
• Set rules for TV watching on school nights. 
• Eliminate background TV.
• Take responsibility for finding other things for your kids to do rather than watch TV. This will be especially true immediately after you lower their consumption. After a while, however, you’ll be surprised how kids manage to find other things to do.  After all, kids have survived for millions more years without TV than with it.

Tips on How to Deal with Toddler Tantrums

Toddlers may throw tantrums from time to time. As a parent, you have no choice but to put up with it or try to subdue your toddler. Most parents usually ending up taking action with the idea that stopping the behavior quickly is important in developing good habits. However, try to correct a child in a way that corrects the behavior in a positive and loving way.

Tantrums most frequently occur between the ages of two and five. Before you can curb toddler tantrums, you need to know the causes behind them:

• Fatigue or hunger pangs
• Lack of proper attention
• Not getting what they desire
• Unhappiness or frustration

Here are some tips on how to deal with your toddlers’ tantrums:

• Do not pay attention to tantrums: Your toddler is looking for a reaction from you. If he does not get it, he may just move on.
• Encourage quiet and balanced behavior: This will also indicate to your child that throwing tantrums is not productive.
• Allow other alternatives: This will prevent situations where toddlers might feel trapped and allow them to get in control of the situation by exercising their choice on the matter. Try to provide your child with options that give the impression that he is exercising free will. “Would you like to put your pajamas on first or brush your teeth first?” “Would you like to eat carrots or peas?” Would you like to put on your socks first or your shirt?” While none of these questions are real choices for an adult, a child will feel more control and will often willingly follow through because ‘he has decided what to do next.’

Improve Your Baby’s Table Manners

Babies can act like cavemen at the dinner table and be perfect savages even at their own birthday party. They will do it when they are angry; they do it to show their love. Reasons aside, teaching them proper table manners will be the first step towards the lifelong discipline and etiquette that should sooner-not later-be second nature to your child. Remember, the more disciplined and consistent you are, the more disciplined and consistent your child will be. Breaking the rules from time to time may only serve to confuse your child.

Here are some basic table rules you also need to follow. Children can only learn by example:

• Make sure meals are quiet-no lecturing at the table.
• No arguments and raised voices.
• No playing with food. Gently but firmly discourage your baby from throwing food around at the table.
• Use gentle and clear words such as ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ to ask for anything desired.
• Offer babies small portions at regular intervals and show appreciation when they ‘clean’ their plates.
• Familiarize your baby with eating with forks and spoons. The best way to do this is to let your child see you using them.

At the Restaurant

• Order your child’s food first to prevent long waits. This will prevent your child from becoming bored or impatient.
• Make sure your baby is well rested and hungry when you arrive at the table.
• Don’t reprimand your child in public.
• Take your baby for a short stroll if you notice any signs of crankiness.

Well-behaved children are a joy to have around you. On the other hand, misbehaved children are a constant source of worry, trouble and unhappiness. Therefore, parents need to encourage good and balanced behavior in their children not only for their own benefit but also for the benefit of the children themselves and the society in which they are being brought up. Find more articles related on tips to help you discipline your toddler in a positive way without being harsh or cruel.

How Can You Discipline Your Child Gently?

Well-behaved children are a joy to have around you. On the other hand, misbehaved children are a constant source of worry, trouble and unhappiness. Therefore, parents need to encourage good and balanced behavior in their children not only for their own benefit but also for the benefit of the children themselves and the society in which they are being brought up.

As children grow and explore newer activities, it becomes necessary to exercise at least some level of authority over them. Parents need to teach their toddlers to accept authority when it is communicated to them. The trick to disciplining your toddler is to be firm, yet gentle. Remember, you are doing it for your toddler’s good.

Here are some tips to help you discipline your toddler in a positive way without being harsh or cruel:

• Give clear directives: Leave no room for miscommunication while giving instructions to your child.

• Be practical: Be aware regarding what constitutes normal behavior at your child’s age. Set realistic expectations based on this knowledge.

• Be committed: Stick by your words no matter what. If you are not consistent and or give in too easily, chances are your toddler will not take you seriously.

• Practice what you preach: If you routinely do something that you have defined as incorrect, your toddler will not understand why there are different rules for you. Make it a point to use “please” and “thank you” yourself, for instance, in order to get your child to use them. You may even give your toddler the chance to correct you if you do not follow the rules you make.

• Understand the mental level of your toddler: You need to explain the consequences of undisciplined behavior in a manner that is comprehensible to your child.